HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?

I was always the crazy one
I broke into the stadium
And I wrote your number on the 50 yard line
You were always the perfect one
And the valadictorian so
Under your number I wrote "call for a good time"
I only wanted to catch your attention
But you overlooked me somehow
Besides you had too many boyfriends to mention
And I played my guitar too loud.
How do you like me now?
How do you like me now,
Now that I'm on my way?
Do you still think I'm crazy
Standin here today?
I couldnt make you love me
But I always dreamed about living in your radio
How do you like me now?
When I took off to Tennessee
I heard that you made fun of me
Never imagined I'd make it this far
Then you married into money girl
Aint it a cruel and funny world?
He took your dreams and tore them apart.
He never comes home
And youre always alone
And your kids hear you cryin down the hall
Alarm clock starts ringin
Who could that be singin
Its me baby, with your wake up call!
How do you like me now?
How do you like me now,
Now that I'm on my way?
Do you still think I'm crazy
Standin here today?
I couldnt make you love me
But I always dreamed about living in your radio
How do you like me now?
Tell me baby...
I will preach on...
- Toby Keith

First of all, any guy that breaks into a stadium to write my number on the 50 yard line is a rebel with no cause and is pretty much automatically hot unless there is another stipulation. I don't have too many boyfriends to mention but guys that play instruments do tend to have the upper hand in most cases. I will definitely be saying How Do You Like Me Now? to all the people who doubt me now.


-----B

EVERYBODY PRAISE THE LORD

There's a growing root of bitterness
In the world today
From the heart of Johannesburg
To the ghettos of L.A.
A swelling violent undertow
Has gripped the soul of man
But an integrated cry of hope
Echoes across the land
I hear my brothers say
Come, everybody, it's time to start
To let the love of Jesus
In your heart
Every tongue and every race
All of God's children seek His face
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
People of promise take your place
Tell of His mercy and His grace
Lift up your voice to the sky
All of God's children testify
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
We worship You because You are Lord and King
We magnify You because You are the One who reigns
We glorify You because You always remain the same
We worship You because You are Lord and King
We magnify You because You are the One who reigns
We glorify You because You always remain the same
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord

We got no time for hit and miss
The world is full of prejudice
You know we just ain't down with this, so come on now
Everybody priase the Lord
He inhabits our praises
Sin He erases
He wants to amaze us, so say this
Everybody praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Praise the Lord, everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
Everybody, praise the Lord
- Carman

The struggles of everyday life doesn't just play to the pampered lives of rich Americans. It's all over the world. People want to hate each other so much but they also want to have unity. We can't have both people. If it weren't for my youth group, I wouldn't be able to keep as strong in my faith. They help pull me through. Every person, whether we consider them evil or not, is a child of God and we should treat them as so. Everybody should praise the Lord. I know I should practice what I preach and I would like to be the one testify more but I can't bring myself to stir up the courage to do so. EVERYBODY needs to praise the Lord. God is always there and is never faltering in his love for us. He has been there since the beginning and he will be there till the end.

-----B

GIRLS

Girls - all I really want is girls
And in the morning it's girls
Cause in the evening it's girls
I like the way that they walk
And it's chill to hear them talk
And I can always make them smile
From White Castle to the Nile
Back in the day
There was this girl around the way
She liked my home-piece M.C.A.
He said he would not give her play
I asked him, "Please?" - he said, "You may."
Her pants were tight and that's ok
If she would dance - I would D.J.
We took a walk down to the bay
I hope she'll say, "Hey me and you should hit the
hay!"
I asked her out - she said, "No way!"
I should've probably guess their gay
So I broke North with no delay
I heard she moved real far away
That was two years ago this May
I seen her just the other day
Jockin' Mike D. to my dismay
Girls - to do the dishes
Girls - to clean up my room
Girls - to do the laundry
Girls - and in the bathroom
Girls - that's all I really want is girls
Two at a time - I want girls
With new wave hairdos - I want girls
I ought to whip out my - girls, girls, girls, girls,girls,
girls, girls, girls,
girls!
-Beastie Boys

You know, I'm huge fan of the Beastie Boys but I can't help but find this song a little bit sexist. It shows how the male populatin thinks that they can just own women like pieces of property. Maybe if girls weren't so sleezy, guys wouldn't believe that they can think they can do anything. Women aren't slaves and they aren't here to serve men. I like the girl in the song who says "No Way" to a date. She stood up for herself and the rest of us should do the same!


-----B

Straight Lines

Breathing from a hole in my lung
I had no one
But faces in front of me
Racing through the void in my head
To find traces of a good luck academy
Sparks ignite and trade them for thought
About no one
And nothing in particular
Washed the sickened socket and drove
Resent nothing
There's good will inside of me
Wake me up lower the fever
Walking in a straight line
Set me on fire in the evening
Everything will be fine
Waking up strong in the morning
Walking in a straight line
Lately I'm a desperate believer
But walking in a straight line
Something I will never forget
I felt desperate
And stuck to the marrow
Invisible to everyone else
I'm a sex change
And a damsel with no heroine
Wake me up lower the fever
Walking in a straight line
Set me on fire in the evening
Everything will be fine
Waking up strong in the morning
Walking in a straight line
Lately I'm a desperate believer
But walking in a straight line
I don't need no time to say
There's no changing yesterday
If we keep talking and
I keep walking in straight lines
Wake me up lower the fever
Walking in a straight line
Set me on fire in the evening
Everything will be fine
Waking up strong in the morning
Walking in a straight line
Lately I'm a desperate believer
But walking in a straight line
- Silverchair

Don't let yourself get lost in the shuffle. Be the person who stands out in the crowd. Who wears hot pink when everyone else is wearing black. Sometimes the best thoughts come from things don't mean anything. Everyone should be filled with good will towards men. Keep yourself on the straight and narrow and you will realize that everything is going to be okay. There is not need to fret about things said and done because they are in the past. Leave all sense of desperation behind. Everything will truly be fine if you let it be that way. Don't let other influence your beliefs.

Straight and narrow is the best way to go. Period.

-----b

YOU'RE NOT ALONE TONIGHT

When reality gets too real
And the fires of hell to close
But I'm here to let you know
That you can make it through
If you believe that someone is watchin' over you
And call it an angel
Call it a muse
And call it karma that you've got comin' to you
What's the difference
What's in a name
What matters most is never ever losin' faith
'Cause it's gonna be alright
You're not alone tonight
We all have our days
When nothing goes as planned
And not a soul in the world
Seems to understand
And for someone to talk to
You'd give anything
Well go on and cry out loud
'Cause someone's listenin'
Yeah, and call it an angel
Call it a muse
And call it karma that you've got comin' to you
What's the difference
What's in a name
What matters most is never ever losin' faith
'Cause it's gonna be alright
You're not alone tonight
Keep your faith alive
You're not the only one
Yeah, and call it an angel
Call it a muse
Call it karma that you've got comin' to you
What's the difference
What's in a name
What matters most is never ever losin' faith
Yeah, you're gonna be alright
You're not alone tonight
Oh you can cry if you want to, go on
- Keith Urban

It's important to realize that you are never alone and you don't have to be alone. There is always your true friends right there by your side but more importantly there is a God in heaven that cares for you no matter where you've been or who you've become. Whoever said "big girls don't cry" deserves to be punched in the face because sometimes crying is the best remedy for a situation. Think about it, we cry when someone hurts our feelings, we cry when a baby is born, we cry when we break up a relationship but we also cry when people get married. There is nothing wrong with crying and I believe it can make you a stronger person. Keep persistent in everything you do and good karma will come back to you

Trust in your God in heaven and let every tear fall where it may.

-----b

Gaga OoO La La

So the ups and downs of the emotional roller coaster of today have caused me to blog.
Not neccessarily a deadly sin but enough to pull me through.

I start off waking up feeling like I'm sitting on top of the world because I just bought a banging outfit Banana Republic and was ready to display it to the world. But then just like a scene out of Mean Girls, with my LBD and knee high boots in tow, the parents were split on judgement. You got father looking me up and down in dismay like a hooker on a street corner but then you got mom on the other hand raving about how cute and stylish the ensem is. Gah, to think only 264 days until I move into my College Dorm......counting down faster than the ball droppin at New Years'

Once at church I have a mental meltdown when I realize that the internet connection on the computer is on the fritz. What else could be new seeing how this computer literally lives to DESTROY my life. But whatever, it was effectively resolved later and my duties as POWERPOINT GIRL were resumed. I couldn't help but being extremely proud of the benediction of the service though. Girls' Ensemble got to rock out and we were overwhelmingly welcomed after our performance. Thsi created quite an extensive amount of hype around our following debuts at the Christmas Candlelight service.

But my optimal meltdown came at the later of the day. After being accused by my psycho mother of intentionally sabotaging her Christmas bins and their labels, I came into some interesting information that kind of made me flip my lid a little but not too much. Nothing that couldn't be resolved by Lady Gaga and MK of course.

Ode to Gaga:
When you give me K-Kisses, that's money honey...
Ra Ra Ra a a, Ma Ma Ma a a a, Gaga ooo la la...
LUHVE, LUHVE LUHVE LUHVE...
p p p poker face p p p poker face....
Don't need no paper gangsta...


So after submergement in total gaga-ocity and of course medium amounts of venting, the proper state of mind was restored.
Then there was the ride home that was intruded by the iPOD shuffle setting of nothing but stupid tragic lovesongs that make SICK!
But yeah, tomorrow is a new day and I'm not about living in yesterday but we'll see how the rest of the week goes.....

Song of the Second:
Errbody gettin crunk crunk
Boys tryin to touch my junk junk
Gonna smack em if they gettin too drunk drunk
Goin to they kick us out
or the police shut us down down
police shut us down down
po po shut us down
- Ke$sha


--------b

BLOGGING ABOUT MY IDEALS

SO MUCH TO TALK ABOUT TODAY:

1. THE WIZARD OF OZ
The Wizard of Oz was on TV tonight and it's basically one of my favorite musicals of all time. It was the first play that I was in when I moved to Anderson so there are just soooo many memories held in that crazy world of green. In my senior year it is really fun to look back on that play that I did in 6th grade.

2. BOYFRIEND
The dictionary defines a boyfriend as "a favored male companion or sweetheart."
Urban dictionary defines a boyfriend as "The nice guy you settle for when you realize that the hot bad boys you fall for are just manwhores who make you cry as often as they make you come."
That's all I have to say about that but I just thought that it would be fun to look at the actual definition of the word since so many people have so many varying opinions. Urban Dictionary is most def the winner in the definition comepetition.

3. BASKETBALL
Ohhh basketball how I love you. I run slow on purpose because I hate to run but it's soo fun to be with my team. They are a crazy bunch of girls. Of course, I shooting foul shots all night and then when it comes to doing it in front of other people I choke! I just gotta start thinking "like a baby like a baby" when I'm shooting. I still can't wait until that first game comes!

4. CHURCH
So let me just start off by saying that I am a part of the most epic youth group ever. We are not obnoxiously large group but we are not particularly small either. Our youth pastor, Rev-Trav, always teaches a great things. While sometimes we get off on some tangible tangents, our conversations usually get into some deep discussiions that usually end in awesome quotes like "awkward sex!" I spend all my free time at church. You really should check us out sometime because we love to meet new people!

5. LEELAND
OMG OMG OMG My favorite band of all time!!!! They're new CD came out a little while ago and I followed all the updates online strongly anticpating their 3rd album debut but alas when the day finally did come I was unable to get to the store and buy it! I never got around to it but my friend MK finally helped me to remember by letting me borrow her copy tonight and I was so stoked. I haven't been this happy about Leeland since I got to me Jack Mooring himself at StudentLife 2 years ago. Go check out the album because it's amazing. So far my favorite track is most definitely "Via Dolorosa."


OOOOhhh what a day and what a weekend! Unfortunately, tomorrow starts another week of school but senior year is flying by so I there is much to look forward too.

TERRIBLE WEEK, TRUE FRIENDS

So I am sitting here contemplating the past week. While it has been quite dreadful, it is now finally coming to a close. I am going to a speech and debate competition tomorrow compete for the first time in Children's Literature. That should be quite fun.

But in light of my terrible week, I realized what excellent friends I have. God has blessed me with more people than I deserve. People that I have nothing and everything in common with. There have been so many that have been great friends to me, I only hope that I have done the same for them. While most are surrounded with the ideas of "What if I'm not pretty enough?" or "What if I'm not popular enough?" All these things are so petty now. I don't need to try to conform to some kind of society view of what pretty is and like I said, I've got more friends than I deserve. In this thanksgiving season, I am most greatful for these people.




These people will never know what they mean to me because I just don't tell them enough but it does mean a lot to me that they care.

BLOGGER REBOOT

So after all this time of having this blog as a requirement for a class, I have decided to return to it to try to express some thoughts as I deem necessary. Some people may find what I have to say insignificant but I just need an outlet of writing.

Read if you will, read if you must but know that it is all Brooke. :)

REFLECTION

PART I
The topic of my personal memoir was my Atlanta Mission Trip that I took over the summer with my youth group. My second piece was written about the hypocrisy of Hester by Dimmesdale from The Scarlet Letter. My third piece was based on the character Mary Warren from the play The Crucible. My fourth piece was an essay based on a personal nature experience that I related to Emerson and Thoreau's way of thinking.
When I was writing my personal memoir I was really trying to remember all the sensory details and memories from my trip. In writing "The Scarlet Letter: The Hypocrisy of Hester" I was trying to distinguish just exactly what is was that made Dimmesdale tick. Through my piece on Mary Warren, the main point I was trying to convery was all the different sides or personalities of Mary Warren were demonstrated in the play. In my final nature essay, my main purpose for writing it was to relate my modern experiences with the historical Emerson and Thoreau's perspectives.
The thoughts that were running through my head when I was writing each of these pieces were very numerous. While writing "Only in Atlanta" I was trying to capture the experience that I had working with underprivelaged children in Atlanta on paper. The thoughts of my nature essay followed the same type of writing, it captured another memory in a different manor. My nature essay was less about recalling an experience as much as using sensory details to describe the feeling of my experience at the beach. In both the "The Scarlet Letter: The Hypocrisy of Hester" and "Crucible Metaphor Essays" my thought process was simply to produce a good character analysis from my opinion.
Once I look back at my essays that I have written, I realize that couple of the pieces have some similar characteristics. My nature essay and personal memoir are definitely connected in that they are both personal recounts of what I saw and what I felt. None else knows how I feel, enough so that they could write it down and it and be correct. Also, the remaining two essays that I composed were based on a form of character analysis. Each one shows a personal understanding of the characters in the book and the ways that I related to the them.
I've disovered that through my writing processes this year I have noticed things are a little bit different for me. Colons, semi-colons, and commas used to be a source of trouble, but now I feel that I developed a better sense of when it is appropriate to use them. Another thing I've noticed is that I'm able to develop my ideas more. It's not that I couldn't develop my ideas before, it's that I now feel as if my ideas are more elaborate. I've really tried to step outside the "cooky-cutter" ways of writing. Finally, I've notice that I've been able to pick out and correct a lot more grammatical errors. Sometimes I'll start writing and just get so into it and start going so fast that my thoughts will end up on the page but not necessarily in the correct format. Basically, I get what I want to say written down before my brain discloses the thought, then go back and make sure the words are written in the way they should be.

PART 2
My first drafts ended up needing a lot more work than I thought they would need. Even though they weren't perfect the first time around, I believe that's the way it should be; as they say, "Rome wasn't built in a day." The first major revision was in my Scarlet Letter essay. My contributors all unanimously agreed that I needed to develop my ideas about hyprocrisy when I was describing Hester and Dimmesdale. Also, I decided to add more book reference when I was talking about Dimmesdale. The Scarlet Letter: The Hypocrisy of Hester
In my second piece, I was able make some revisions also. I thought I had done a well enough job of presenting my thoughts but my callaborators thought differently. This is the point where I came in and added some relationship details between my experience and Emerson and Thoreau's. Also, I believe this case in partcular is an excellent example of what I was talking about in part 1 about developing ideas. Here I thought that the piece was complete, but when another person comes in and reads it, they see what it's lacking. By having people help me out, I'm able to learn where I'm going wrong in writing. This has been extrememly benneficial. Nature Essay: Some Beach, Somewhere

PART 3
One of my classmates that I noticed in particular was Eric Brujell. Through reading his piece I felt like I could relate with his loss of grandfather. I personally lost my grandfather this year so I could see how important it was for Eric to recall a positive memory of his grandfather. It also let me see a more sensitive side of Eric that I think that he usually doesn't like to show. In reading this memoir I learned some things about Eric that I didn't know. I think that's what you are suppose to accomplish when writing a personal memoir. Eric's Personal Memoir
The second person I chose was Luke Mostellar. The thing I liked best about Luke's essay was his mechanics. His special attention to detail led to me to feel like I was in the story. This is especially true because I'm not even Luke's class so I wasn't there to experience what Luke's class did. Luke definitely has a talent for writing. Luke's October 11th Post
Finally, the third person that I selected was Cauley Simmons. When I read her story "Lizzy" I couldn't help but kind of frown at her sad story. Before the end I was smiling though. Cauley's story takes you on emotional rollercoaster. She uses a great deal of suspense when she toils with your emotions. she makes you wonder if she going to make friends at her new school. Then she breaks her heart when she tells you Lizzy treats her. Finally, Cauley makes you laugh when you disover that Cauley and Lizzy could put their differences aside and became friends. Her special attention to details also caught my eye. For example, when describes the chain reaction that caused her to fall on Lizzy and then again when she discusses the long process that her and Lizzy had to experience to become friends. Overall, this is an exceptional story of a classic friendship. Cauley's "Lizzy"

The Scarlet Letter: The Hypocrisy of Hester

Dimmesdale is perceived as being innocent and unfaltering simply because he is a minister. One can tell this is not true when reading from a limited omniscient point of view. The preacher preaches the word, then turns his back on it when it comes to his personal status. Hypocrisy: a pretense of having some desirable or publicly approved attitude that one does not possess. See also: Dimmesdale. How can you expect people to respect and follow your teachings, when you can't even apply them to your own life?
Dimmesdale has created an image of himself for the world to see, out of the public scaffold. The scaffold can be a podium of shame; hoisting all that is wrong with you high in the air for all the world to see. In this case, Dimmesdale's major flaw is that he is a hypocrite. The way Dimmesdale leads two lives causes him to be labeled as a hypocrite because behind closed doors he breaks the rules as much as he wants. In the case of carnal knowledge involving Hester, Dimmesdale is very open with his feelings. He proclaims his love to Hester because it is what he feels, then he shuns Hester in front of everyone else. He walks one way but talks another.
It's understandable why Dimmesdale is trying to hide his skeletons in the closet due to his highly revered position; it's frowned upon in modern society. Today, if a person like him were to reveal secrets such as this in a high ranking position, he would be under a tremendous amount of public scorn and scrutiny; society would turn their backs and feel betrayed. Throughout the book, the frail preacher struggles with his conscience. He knows what is right but wants to know if he can bear paying the price for being involved in the corruption of Puritan society by way of adultery.
On the other hand, Dimmesdale is interested in maintaining the relationship he has with Hester. He feels an overwhelming amount of responsibility for not being in Pearl's life. The constant struggle with his conscience is antagonizing him every minute of his day. The prestiged preacher seems to find comfort in physically beating himself up inside a closet, away from the rest of the world. It seems that the fighting and guilt in his mind are easier to relieve through cutting and brusing himself instead of actually revealing the truth to people. The man of the town manages to work through the pain but still wants to find a way to reveal his true identity in the easiest way possible.
Dimmesdale doesn't know what's right and what's wrong. He doesn't know which way is up and which way is down. Eventually he settles the battle by attempting to leave for Europe. Unfortunately he never makes it to Europe because he collapses and dies on the scaffold before he could set sail. Before his soul settled permanently, Dimmesdale got the chance to redeem himself and tell the entire Puritan community of his sin of adultery. It was kind of ironic that right after he confesses all his deadly sins and secrets, he actually dies.

Some Beach, Somewhere

"Don't waste yourself in rejection, nor bark against the bad, but chant the beauty of the good."
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
I can directly relate with this profound essayist when I reminisce about the time I traveled to Emerald Isle, North Carlina on spring break. Personally, I love the beach. My mom tends to want to explore the mountains. I for one, could not wait to get the island. I was picturing a marvelous beach and listening to crooning waves crash against the shore. As soon as I arrived at the beach house, I greeted the friends we were meeting there, then made a quick dash for the back door. There was a sliding glass door leading to a deck with stairs that went right onto the beach. I called into the house, "I"ll be right back!" I slipped off my flip flops and scurried down the stairs. I didn't even care that the sand was piping hot against the balls of my feet. It was warm sand that I rarely got to experience! I wanted to "chant the beauty of good" more than ever. When I saw the foamy waves, I couldn't resist; I started making my way toward the edge of the water.
My toes had the powdery white sand slinking in and out between them. I inched toward the water as I heard screeching seagulls all around. There was a slight breeze, and it wasn't too hot nor too cold. Before I stepped in the water, I glanced up and down the beach, almost as if I was checking to see that nobody was watching me commit a forbidden sin. One step. Two more steps. A couple of tiptoe steps. Brrr! Retreat! The water felt like an artic glacier in liquid form. My small toes scurried out fast and set out to defrost in the warm sand. While waiting for the feeling to come back to my feet, I noticed a couple of seashells and crouched down to pick them up. There was one, amidst all the broken shells, that was a perfect creme color without any cracks or blemishes. Once I scooped up the glossy souvenier, I headed back up to the house. This is where I discovered another set of stairs that lead up to a small deck at the top of the house.
Simplicity is what I found atop that roof. "Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify."- Henry David Thoreau. A single solitary chair withing a rickety bannister was up there. I proceeded to sit there in that chair and just breathe in the salty air. Soon thereafter, I noticed the sun was going down. I've never seen anything more beautiful than a soft orange sun, setting in a baby pink sky, proceeding to descend over a vast water that was never ending. We arrived at the house at about 4:00pm, and my mom came outside to get me at about 8:30pm. She was freaking out because she didn't know where I was. I let out a yell from the roof and she walked up the stairs. My mother forced me to come down from the roof for dinner, but I continued to linger as I walked down the steps; I just couldn't get enough of the star-filled sky. It's not every day that I experience their twinkles quite so bright, for I live in the city and it tends to masquerade all thought of even looking into the sky for beauty. Maybe that's why I agree with Thoreau's philosophy of a life frittered away by detail and simplifying things. I don't think I'll ever get more simplistic than sitting atop a house watching the sunset. It's a good thing I still have the pearly seashell to help remember to step back and simplify.
Emerson and Thoreau would have definitely appreciated the safe haven of a solitary beach. I think they would have sat in rocking chairs next to me on the roof. Just like these two fine gentleman, I was able to get out of reality for a couple of moments and breathe in clean air and thoughts. Emerson and Thoreau were a tag team that tried so desperately to change the world's perspective the way they changed their own. They turned bad situations, like a death in the family, into an appreciation of the simpler things in life. I realized that taking a step back and changing my perspective, really helped me to appreciate the world around me in the way that Emerson and Thoreau did.